Wednesday, January 20, 2010

mean girls

Girls. Girls are mean!

We were at the library today and as we head back to the childrens area I hear little girl voices and think "oh good! Ellie will have someone to play with."


There were 3 moms and 3 little girls there about Ellie's age. The three moms were obviously together and spent the entire time we were there talking and gossiping about famous people.

Ellie wonders around a bit while I pick out some books for her and I see she is trying to work up the courage to ask them to play. She goes over to them and asks to play and at first they let her. She sits down with them and plays what they are playing and not 2 minutes later, this little girl says (loudly):

"go away! we don't like you! your shirt is for babies!"
and the other 2 laugh.
The mothers say nothing.

Ellie (who is wearing a Cinderella shirt) comes over to me and looks sad and I tell her its ok (even though it is NOT ok) and we build a few puzzles together. I ask if she wants to leave and she didn't.

A few minutes later, Ellie is playing with a toy and the same little girl pushes her back and tells her to get out of the way. Meanly. Ellie just looked at her and her little chin started to quiver.

Again, the mothers say nothing. And it happened right in front of them.

At this point I was furious and we just left. At the front of the library I knelt down and told her that she is a good girl and those girls were mean and they should have apologized after being mean to her. I also told her the next time she gets pushed she DOES NOT have to take it. She can politely tell the other child NOT to do that. It isn't nice.

Now I know kids are kids and such, and this kind of thing is going to happen, but c'mon! The other mothers saw what was going on and totally ignored it.

I also know that my kid isn't perfect. She tends to be a little whiny and dramatic (among other things) but she is always nice to other kids, asks them to play, makes sure everyone gets a turn, etc... To see her get her feelings hurt just breaks my heart. This is the first time I have witnesses outright hostility toward my kid and it was not fun.

God. The teenage years are going to tear me to pieces.


shelley c. said...

Oh, man. That totally stinks. I have so totally seen it happen with Julia, too, since she just loves to go up to new kids and try to make friends right away. She is so sweet and excited about it, and has been rebuffed many times. I am so sorry those girls were so mean to Ellie. Their moms are setting a really horrible example for them. (((hugs))) to both of you!!

Molly said...

Wow. And those mothers will wonder why their daughters turned out the way they did. Where did they go wrong? Um, how about letting them think it is OK to act like that towards another person? I would be mortified if my child did either of those things!

Isabella said...

Awwwe I feel so bad for Ellie! The sad thing is, girls still do this at my school but instead of the shirt its your hair or your shoes and even your friends. Middle school drama is mostly about boys.... Why do girls have to be so mean!?!

Lourdes said...

All little girls should be just like Ellie! Mine were. You are such a wonderful Mom and Ellie will be the daughter other Moms wish they had raised. I remember scenes just like this library one. It breaks my heart to hear of this and sadddens me to know that there are young mothers that raise their daughters to be so inconsiderate. Sweet girls will conquer!