Thursday, May 15, 2008

then and now...the grocery

I think I am gonna do a "then and now" series. Just of different everyday events. The first is the grocery.


Get in car.
Listen to the cool new song on the radio.
Go through the drive-thru for a cuppa joe.
Get to the grocery.
Leisurely stroll up and down the aisles as I decide what I want to cook for the week.
Read magazine while waiting to check out.
Spend $50.oo for a weeks worth of groceries.
Load all 2 bags in car.
Come home and put groceries away.


Make a meal plan for the week.
Make grocery list.
Cut coupons for corresponding items needed.
Get online and look up more coupons.
Tell Ellie at breakfast that we are going to the grocery and she will get a cookie.
Plan exact "plan of attack" to minimize time in store.
Pack snack and sippy.
Shoes, jacket, hat, sunglass, sunscreen on Ellie.
Try to convince her she doesn't need to take her stuffedanimaloftheday to the grocery.
Pick up Ellie and stuffedanimaloftheday and put her in the car.
Load up recycleables.
Get in car.
Go back inside for reusable shopping bags I forgot.
Get in car.
Go back inside for coupons I forgot.
Drop off recycleables. "Doing mommy? DOING MOMMY???"
Ellie asks 47 times if she gets a cookie on the 5 minute drive.
Listen to Ellie's cd.
Park car and take Ellie and stuffedanimalofthedayinside.
Put Ellie in cart and wipe down with bleach wipe.
Start in the produce.
Ellie asks for her cookie which we get at the end of the produce section.
and again...
and again...
and again...
Get cookie. Say thank you to the snarky bakery lady.
Ignored by snarky bakery lady.
Pick up stuffedanimaloftheday.
Stopped by an old lady with one tooth to tell me how beautiful Ellie is.
Say thank you and move on. I have only got so much time.
Ellie finishes cookie and asks for sippy. Get sippy.
Get to the 3rd aisle before Ellie asks for a snack. Get goldfish out.
Stopped in 4th aisle as snaggletooth again ogles Ellie, and tells me all about her 11 grandchildren.
Pick up stuffedanimaloftheday.
Get to the 5th aisle before Ellie runs out of water.
Buy water bottle and fill up sippy.
Get to freezer section before Ellie starts to melt down.
Finish as fast as possible, picking up stuffedanimaloftheday at least 3 more times.
Get in line.
Realize I forgot waffles during the meltdown in the freezer section and go get them.
Get back in line.
Endure stares from unmarried bitches with no children as Ellie is whining LOUDLY.
Look longingly at magazines.
Pull out Ellie's animal book and we point out different animals. "A cow says moo mommy!"
Load groceries on belt while Ellie opens and eats a three musketeers. Ooops.
Add three musketeers wrapper to groceries.
Ignore the weird bagger lady who asks if Ellie is still in diapers as she bags them. I want to tell her that Ellie has been potty trained for months and the diapers are for my husband. Weirdo.
Pay $125.oo for a weeks worth of groceries. Damn organics!
Get out to car and realize I forgot stamps. Decide mail can wait.
Load all 10 bags.
Snaggletooth pulls up and says she offers competetive rates for babysitting. Um, no thanks.
Get home and unload bags from car while Ellie asks the entire time to play outside.
Let Ellie play outside while I put groceries away. Put bread away, check on Ellie. Put pasta sauce away, check on Ellie, put animal crackers away, check on Ellie, etc...
Go outside and realize it might take a little longer and cost more now, but it sure is worth it!

Go to cook dinner and realize I forgot milk....

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